my super power

I have what I like to call a super power.  I think its great - when it works to my advantage.  You might not think its so amazing, but I do.  So are you ready?

I am pretty good at reading people's authenticity.  I put it this way because I mean that I'm pretty good at knowing when people are b.s.ing or manipulating.  I'm pretty good at noticing when people are fibbing/being deceptive, or being surfacy, or covering up for how they really feel.  A lot of people's actions and intentions are transparent to me (Of course there are exceptions to this rule, but for the most part, I can read people in this way).

Here's the catch: (well there's two actually)

1.  My power does not work on myself.  It only works when I'm viewing the situation from the outside.  Meaning I can't tell when I'm being manipulated, or when people are lying or being surfacy with me (In one-on-one situations).

2. I haven't completely learned to control this power.  I can, on occasion, let my own opinions and feelings towards a person cloud my impressions of them.  This is a rare occasion, and usually only happens when I feel threatened.  And I'm generally quickly proven wrong and forced to re-evaluate.

I think its a pretty good power because it helps me to get to know the people around me.  And I like people, and I like getting to know them better.  So how can I argue with this gift?  I can't.  I'm just going to practice and refine it.

do you ever have one of those days?

I woke up this morning in a funk. I was jolted awake around 6 am with a terrible tummy ache. I hadn't had anything to eat since dinner at 5pm or so, but I felt incredibly nauseous. So I lay there until 7:30, in complete terror that I would start dry heaving at any moment. No fun.

I couldn't shake it all morning. I got to work and realized that I was late for the meeting that I was told about, but completely forgot. It quickly became one of those days that you just really don't want to be at work.

Add to this the fact that its July, and quite overcast and rainy today in Seattle, and the funk becomes even harder to maneuver out of. It is my philosophy though, that life is a choice. So much so that its tattooed on my arm. Here's what I mean by that.

To an extent, everyone has circumstances that are out of their control, a hand that they are dealt. This is where i think a lot of people give up. The next step in this is that we have a choice!!! We can choose how we react and deal with whatever we are given. The same thing goes with love, self-esteem, etc. Its all a choice. And its a choice that you have to keep on making, not a choice that you can make once and be done with it. Its a daily or even moment to moment thing.

So today my choice is to not stay in this funk. I'm making the choice to get over it. No matter what. Anyone else want to get out of this funk??


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On a separate, unrelated note: I thoroughly enjoy it when people compliment me on my cash counting skills/speed.

live your hopes, not your fears

I am in need of a new creative outlet.  In honor of several new friends that keep a blog, I've chosen this form of expression.  It's much cheaper than painting.

I spent the weekend in Oregon, for my new friends' - Elise and Matt - wedding.  It was absolutely gorgeous there.  Generally speaking, I like having something on the horizon; buildings, mountains, trees, etc.  The house where the wedding was at was in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by fields, no town for miles.  There were mountains in the distance, all around, but far away.  I loved it.  The view was fantastic, the atmosphere loving and exciting.

A few months ago, 5 to be exact, I moved to Seattle.  It was difficult, duh.  I was beyond excited to get out of Elk Grove, and was prepared for what was to come, but actually experiencing it was a whole other story.  It has been a complete blessing and challenge to be here with my best friend.  We have added a new dynamic to our friendship: being roommates.  I like it.

We have gotten jobs, made new friends, started cultivating lives for ourselves in this new place.  We have little things here and there that are the same, like our mutual love of road trips, that help to keep us going when the new environment gets tough.  But most of all, every day is exciting!

I can honestly say that I am completely in love with living in Seattle.  I love being here and sharing it with my best friend.  I love the amazing new people that we've met and had the pleasure to get to know lately.  The Fab Four, as we like to call ourselves, are pretty much the most amazing group of people you'll ever know.  I love that there's always somewhere to go when you want something new, and I love that there's already the tried and true places that have become routine stomping ground.  I love getting up everyday and thinking about how much I love this city.  I love coming around the hill and seeing the Seattle skyline and feeling like I'm home.  I love that its still full of unlimited possibility.  And I love that I don't feel stuck here.

I can't wait for each new day.  And that's a good feeling.